L-O-V-E

During the month of February there is always talk about love because of that wonderful Hallmark Holiday a.k.a. Man's worst enemy a.k.a Valentine's Day. I know as a girl I always look forward to this holiday because of what it will bring, but I am not sure why. Why do I say that?? Because every year when this holiday comes around Clay and I always fight about it. He always tells me it is a stupid holiday that does not mean anything. So last year I made a big deal about it, and what it meant to me because he never does anything out of the ordinary to show his affection, and all I told him was I am not asking for diamonds, going out and buying me a Diet Dr. Pepper and a treat is good enough to show that he cares, but no he always thinks I mean a giant 3-ring circus to celebrate Valentine's Day. He bought me flowers last year, but as he is giving them to me said, "Don't expect anything ever again because I will never buy you something on Valentine's Day again...or something like that. Greatest way to receive a gift right??!! Well anyways this year I was not expecting anything because of that whole argument, but Clay surprised me with a boquet of spring flowers, and I was so thrilled! But this is not the reason I am writing about love because it was not about the flowers it is about what love is.

This year for Clay and I has been very trying, we have faced some major bumps in our marriage that I will not go into detail about, but because of these bumps I am now reflecting on our relationship as a whole. Clay and mine's relationship started out like everyone elses; young and head over heels in love, but it did not continue on that loving bliss, but hit a major bump from early on. When we got married it was not that feeling either, it was pretty much just being married because we were parents. I went so many nights thinking, Is this really what marriage is???? Always being away from each other physically and pretty much emotionally too? I always tell everyone that marriage is the hardest thing you will ever do, and when they ask me why I always say: Because you have to share ABSOULTELY EVERYTHING with that other person. And it is not a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship when you can just get up and leave when things get tough you have to stick it out with each other and endure. But it is not just sharing a bed it is sharing everything else: debt, abnormalties (or anything that you think the other person does that is odd lol) finances, closet space, bathrooms, ect. When we finally got to that point it had been a good couple of years...which I'm sure is pretty normal. But now it has been 6 years of being together and we are still facing big bumps, but inbetween these big bumps I have learned a great deal about the two of us and especially what he means to me.

I am not a person who has been blessed with the talent of having lots of friends...or at least keeping them. I am not sure what it is, because I get along with people fine, but I guess it is the loner inside of me that gets the best of me because I sometimes dread being in public situations such as birthday parties, showers, ect. and I am sure it is the brattiness inside of me that escapes from time to time too. Well anyways I have one best friend and that is Clay; he is the calmer during my rages, the first person I call when I have something to say, and someone I can talk to about almost anything (except cheer and that is why I have a few girl-friends :)) But because he is my best friend I am very thankful for our relationship. It is not perfect and I will definitely not blab about him being the perfect husband because he is not just like I am not a perfect wife, and I do not truly believe that there is one perfect husband/wife out there no matter how many people post it on facebook. Everyone fights, cries, screams, and gets annoyed of their significant other at some point or other. Pretty much there are great husband & wives, but never perfect.

I am just thankful for love and how it brings people closer together. It has been the one thing that has tied Clay and I together to keep us going even when either one of us wanted to throw in the towel and call it quits. We have now been together for 6 1/2 years and during that time I have learned a lot about him and he has learned a lot about me. Our love is much stronger today then it was 6 1/2 years ago when we first met. We have faced finances, children, moving, school, job changes, good times and bad, and everything in between together.....L-O-V-E is different to everyone but I am glad I have it to share with him and hopefully it will continue to grow as the years go by.